Mediation for Divorce: Effective Alternative to Litigation

I have always had a strong passion and desire to work with families. I am sure some of this desire came from my upbringing, which was not terrible, but definitely strained. We moved a lot when I was young, and I was in a different school for each new school year. Both of my parents worked a lot, which left my little brother and I often fending for ourselves. Shortly after settling down in a home that was meant to be more permanent than those that came before it, my mother was killed in a car accident. I was 12 years old. As a child, I had no idea what all of this meant to me on a larger scale. However, as an adult, I have learned that the uncertainty I experienced growing up left me with an overwhelming sense of instability. While I have created a sense of stability in my adult life for myself and my family, those formative years still had a tremendous impact on my identity. I have shared my family history with you, not for your sympathy, but instead to offer you my empathy. To let you know that I can relate to what you are feeling. I have been divorced once myself. However, I think events from my childhood, more specifically the loss of my mother at such a young age, provided me with a deep sense of understanding how it feels when your entire world falls from underneath you. When you constantly feel like you are on a small boat in the middle of the ocean during a terrible storm. I spent many years in that boat, and I know how crucial it is to make it off of that boat. My goal is to get you off that boat as well. I obtained my law degree from Thomas Jefferson School of Law and graduated Cum Laude. I was trained as a family mediator, and after gaining some experience, I opened my own firm, San Diego Family Mediation Center, in January 2008. I have solely practiced as a family mediator since that time. To further enhance my ability to provide my clients with the knowledge and tools they need to stabilize their lives, in 2012, I studied and became a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFM™). This has been a fantastic addition to my toolbox. I attend annual conferences to ensure I am up to date on any financial issues that may have changed since the prior year. I also come home from conferences with new creative ideas to help clients through their journey by discussing different issues with my colleagues in the financial world. As with most things in life, it takes a village to obtain the best results. While my village does not sit in the room with us, I assure you, it exists. In my spare time, I enjoy spending time with my husband, our two daughters, our dogs, and three Bengal cats. As a family, we like going to the beach, hiking and spending time with friends and extended family. Why I chose to work in mediation I began my college career on a path to become a psychologist. Along the way, my educational desires changed, but I still had a longing to work with families. Personally, my passion for mediation was first sparked in an undergrad anthropology course. We studied the Lewellyn Indian Tribe and their methods of resolving conflict. Their method was so much more efficient and healthy for all involved. It helped to maintain peace in the tribe and not allow for resentments to grow, which could have led to the Tribe’s demise. I couldn’t help but compare this Tribe to our society and realize that mediation, which essentially is what the Tribe was engaging in, is far superior to our legal system. This theory of using “peacemaking” to resolve legal issues intrigued me so much that I decided law school was the right path for me. Throughout law school, I learned more about the mediation process and knew it was the right path for me. It would allow me to fully embrace my passion for helping families during difficult transitions, as well as my passion for using peacemaking in place of a destructive, cold, highly unaffordable legal process. My community involvement I am a member of the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts and The Academy of Professional Family Mediators. Certified Family Mediator / Certified Divorce Financial Analyst

Nicole Pettes is a highly experienced podcast host known for her engaging interview style and ability to draw out the best in her guests. She has hosted a diverse range of podcasts and video interviews that explore a wide variety of topics. Currently, Nicole is a Video Podcast Host with Learn Formula, where she contributes to their professional education series. She also hosts the Anxious & Ambitious podcast, which explores personal growth and mental health, and co-hosts the Podcast Guesting For Profit, which helps entrepreneurs and podcasters succeed as podcast guests.